Cleaning services needed

I feel like drinking a bottle of Listerine.

If I could put myself through an Insinkerator, I would.

Dance on a bronze hot plate.

Have my limbs cut off, then all orifices stuffed with maggots.

Then jump into a pool of writhing leeches.

Then run a lawn mower over myself, dive in a Dettol-salt solution, and then put myself through a car wash – without the car.

At least then I’ll be clean.

Is this what it was like?

ARRGH it has come full circle.

A bitch, karma is.